Talk About Perspectives

For the 4000th click just registered by this blog, here’s a lengthy list of puns on the half full or half empty perspectives of different people from this humor page:

A well-known proverb states: an optimistic would say a glass is half full, while a pessimist would say it is half empty. What would people of different professions and walks of life say?

The government would say that the glass is fuller than if the opposition party were in power.

The opposition would say that it is irrelevant because the present administration has changed the way such volume statistics are collected.

The philosopher would say that, if the glass was in the forest and no one was there to see it, would it be half anything?

The economist would say that, in real terms, the glass is 25% fuller than at the same time last year.

The banker would say that the glass has just under 50% of its net worth in liquid assets.

The psychiatrist would ask, “What did your mother say about the glass?”

The physicist would say that the volume of this cylinder is divided into two equal parts; one a colorless, odorless liquid, the other a colorless, odorless gas. Thus the cylinder is neither full nor empty. Rather, each half of the cylinder is full, one with a gas, one with a liquid.

The seasoned drinker would say that the glass doesn’t have enough ice in it.

I can’t resist but add the following to the list:

  • The programmer will need to look at the server logs, audit trails and system design before saying something conclusive. This in turn will lead to changes on the glass object or the fill method again.
  • A student would prefer to know which his/her professor is leaning on before saying it’s half full or half empty after all. Furnishing the details of the proof would be the easier part.

Hehehehe… Feel free to add your own takes.

The image was taken from wikimedia commons btw.

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